i hope that everyone's christmas was wonderful and they got to see their family, and they got good presents and all that. overall, my christmas was pretty good. we went over to my grandma's christmas eve and opened some presents with my cousins. then x-mas day we went to my ... aunts (?) house and ate with a bunch of people i didn't really know. the cookies were good tho. i even drank a little coffee, but it was so bitter i didn't even actually take a drink. when we left there, we went to see Tim Burton's, Sweeny Todd. not for the weak of heart i can tell you that. and you can definately tell that it's a Tim Burton because there is death, love and a lot of singing. but its pretty good. very meloncoly and infinate sadness. hehe.
so, here is a list of the presents i got!
"dookie"- Green Day
men's pajama pants (thats my mom for you)
black hoodie w/ multicolor boomboxes
recent mcr poster
3 pair of long argile socks (score!)
dark gray hoodie w/ tree design
"guitar chords" mini poster
hot topic gift card
claires gift card (so i can get my ears peirced)
white studded belt
earphones (thank GOD!)
lotion/body wash/spray combo in ginger flavor
"green person" calender
pre-lain paint canvas set
p.s. TODAY IS JARED'S BIRTHDAY! wish him a happy kwanza/boxing day! he is... *sigh* 36 years old
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[welcome.]
navigating around the school hallways and seeing the people walk by, i look into their faces. i notice their hair color, whether they wear glasses, what color eyes they have, who they walk with... its corny, but i try to look past all of that, too. once and awhile its nice for someone as shy as me to pass another person in the hall, a complete stranger no less, who dares to make eye contact and sends my heart into flutters. i can't help thinking, "that person saw me." but its not really the act of "seeing" itself, its more the act of "searching," that means most to me. i feel lost. i feel disposable; a picture frame that gets a scratch across the glass and is thrown away, just to be replaced. i don't really have a problem with that, i don't feel like i need to be pitied or ... that i need to seek attention. its the replacement that bothers me. i want to offer something that no one else can, i just haven't found that thing yet. this is just the ramblings of a high school no one who likes to watch rather then do. i like to think of myself as rather quiet, yet excitable and fun to be around. but there's always that underlying feeling of unease and awkwardness, that i've only been able to overcome a few times in my life. i don't want to change who i am. i don't want others to pretend to see in me what they don't. i want people to see the bad side of me, and spend the time searching for the good. i look for the best in others, and often times face the flaws in myself. welcome to my public diary...
1 comment:
aw... 36? rounded up to 40... but that's ok... -pats little rekky on back- now melanie's dad can have him! and JON WILL COME TO THE WEDDING AND I COULD MEET HIM AND WE COULD BE FRIENDS AND SOON WE COULD BE-- aw, if only that came true... Haha, luffles you. come see my blog:
www.doyoucelebratejon.blogspot.com
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