1.) life sucks
2.) friends are pretty amazing
3.) praying helps
4.) the days just get longer
5.) i hate people sometimes
6.) science is a love/hate relationship
7.) i am the least patriotic person in america
8.) music is my alibi, cofidante and escape
9.) watching random talent show acts on youtube is a great pass time
10.) if you don't say it right off the bat, it's never gunna happen
11.) some things shouldn't be said at all
12.) the best part of a musical is auditioning
13.) concert tickets can turn black in extreme tempatures :(
14.) fighting sucks
15.) sometimes there is too much to say with not enough time to say it
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[welcome.]
navigating around the school hallways and seeing the people walk by, i look into their faces. i notice their hair color, whether they wear glasses, what color eyes they have, who they walk with... its corny, but i try to look past all of that, too. once and awhile its nice for someone as shy as me to pass another person in the hall, a complete stranger no less, who dares to make eye contact and sends my heart into flutters. i can't help thinking, "that person saw me." but its not really the act of "seeing" itself, its more the act of "searching," that means most to me. i feel lost. i feel disposable; a picture frame that gets a scratch across the glass and is thrown away, just to be replaced. i don't really have a problem with that, i don't feel like i need to be pitied or ... that i need to seek attention. its the replacement that bothers me. i want to offer something that no one else can, i just haven't found that thing yet. this is just the ramblings of a high school no one who likes to watch rather then do. i like to think of myself as rather quiet, yet excitable and fun to be around. but there's always that underlying feeling of unease and awkwardness, that i've only been able to overcome a few times in my life. i don't want to change who i am. i don't want others to pretend to see in me what they don't. i want people to see the bad side of me, and spend the time searching for the good. i look for the best in others, and often times face the flaws in myself. welcome to my public diary...
2 comments:
oh no! did you burn the TDG tickets??!?
nooo.... *shifty eyes*
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