...sun.

after being in the sun for 8 hours a day, you really start to get peeved when you look up to the sky and you see that clear blue. any day its raining or cloudy (like people would expect from a place such as, oh i dont know, Forks Washington?) most people would look around and say, "wow, this is a really crappy day." marching band members on the other hand think its the best day ever. i'm not even going to go into details, but now more then ever, i wish i was pale (...still). i hate the sun. too bad we need it to live...

on a brighter note: twilight. ome. i guess you could say its an obsession... i love everything about it- and if i ever got the chance to meet stephanie meyer i can garentee you that my life would be severly different from that day forward, not to mention the flabergasted stuttering that would ensue. she is one of my (many) rolemodels. i hate to say it, but the only thing that is going through my head during marching band is, "twilighttwilighttwilighttedwardcullenwilighttwilightbellatwilighttwilighttwilighttwilighttwilighttwilightihatethesuntwilighttwilight." no joke. i often find myself looking around for someone who i dunno, glitters in the sunlight? its driving me insane. but i i'll live... hopefully.

until later,
[lissa] xoxo

i'm back!

for those of you who didn't know, i just spent a week in san fran-freakin-sisco with my church. it was one of the best, most eye opening couple of days i think i have ever experienced in my life. there was so much going on, so much noise and so much movement that we were doing. each morning my group (which included others from Seattle, Southern California, and Montana) would spend each morning running a "day care" kind of thing for kids in the neighborhood. it was great, the kids were really amazing- and don't take this lightly because i can't usually stand kids. it was really hard to say goodbye to them, even the ones that would give you hell for the week and then give you a kiss on the cheek on the last day. it gives a whole new meaning to the saying, "sour, sweet, gone." every day after we ate lunch with the kids we would go out along ocean avenue and up to the food bank to sort through rotting produce to find fruit that is still good enough to give to people who can't afford to buy some of their own. we would be dancing around and singing and trying to come up with games to play so that it didn't seem so bad. it especially helped when we all got so jolted up that we were shaking and couldn't stay in the same place for more then a second (see my facebook profile picture) :D. overall it was an amazing week, and i met amazing people that i will never forget, and hopefully they won't forget me.

places we visited:
golden gate bridge
alcatraz
fisermans warf
ghirridelli square
the ocean
the food bank
the ymca
chinatown
alamo square
the mall (i can't remember the name exactly...)

p.s.
van parties rock!

what is the most played Across The Universe song on my ipod? Revolution.

wtf? where have i been?!?!?!

look who's back! ahhhhhh! i know i scared you with my sudden appearence. its quite unannounced. haha anyways, there hasnt' been that much going on with me since my last post. summers pretty boring (as usual) and i can't wait for school to start once again- but that's not really a good topic of converestation.

i went up to lake vermillion with my family for sam's birthday, which was pretty fun. i counted 14 bruises on my legs from the tube, not to mention tube burn and alge going places it shouldn't. but it was fun. the cake was really good, i never knew eating wall-e would be so tasty. hm. what else... well right now i'm trying to get limewire to stop throwing a hissy so i can download some songs, a couple of which are, believe it or not, from camp rock. it was surprisingly good. i even hung up a jonas brothers poster in my room, right next to green day and jared. he had a whooping 3 pages in the new "child stars" edition of people. check that shit out.

the posse came over last night and we all sat down to watch the Black Parade is DEAD! dvd. it was soooooo amazing. the posse was talking about how awesome the concert that they went to was and all i could think was "wow, i really missed out." of course i wasn't really friends with any of the posse when they went. the whole time i was watching the dvd i was amazed and shocked and a little bit sad. that was their last concert on this tour, meaning even if i did make it to a concert when they start again, i wouldn't hear all of these songs played live. that sucks. the whole thing was pretty sweet though, we saw two concerts actually- techically 1 and a half. after the credits for the first concert came a part of a second. after mexico they went home to Hobokan, NJ and completely rocked out. it was cool.

okay. limewire still isn't working. that's really starting to piss me off. uhg. it did this last night too... i think i'm about done for this post though, like i said, there wasnt' much to say. haha i'll try and post more often though...

luffles!
once again,

[.lissa.]

p.s.
F.T.W. fuck the what? jeez frank...


what is the most played My Chemical Romance song on my ipod? Discenchanted.

you paint my world

wow i haven't posted in a while. not much has happened in the past week though. more problems with the van of course, but thats old news. i've been txting like crazy too, since mel just got a fone. I'M FREAKIN' EXCITED for the panic! concert. duh. i do of course still have to get my tickets. i'm pretty sure we're doing that later today. we just got a grill. that was horrible in every way possible. so much went wRONg. the food tastes great though. uhg... my eyes hurt after playing rock band for 5 hours yesterday. i'm proud to say that i can almost pass any song on hard. WOOT WOOT! well, i guess i don't have that much to talk about besides that. summer's pretty boring when you have no life...

feel the summer wind

well... i guess it's summer. i'm sure that i will wake up tomorrow at 8 in the morning and freak out thinking that i'm going to be late for school. it really hasn't hit me that school's over. i actually enjoyed it this year and i really want to hold onto the memories. i can't help but think that some moments from this year might mean more to me then others, and when they think back to the school year i'll just be "another person" and not anyone of consequence. at least that's what it feels like sometimes. anyway, i'm going to miss school, even the learning part. besides, summer seems too long when you don't have a life.

i know that i need to stop getting all "deep" and emotional during these posts, but i've just realized something very important. very recently i've had some problems with my faith. i no longer have that "child-like innocence" where you can believe in everything without proof. i'm always watching and listening and sometimes what i find can make it harder to believe. trust me, i want more than anything to believe in God, someone that is always there watching out for you and loving you and forgiving you. but i think the real reason that i haven't been able to really commit to the idea, no matter how many church services i attend, is because i'm afraid to set myself up for disappointment. when i die, there is supposed to be this wonderful place where i will go and i will live for eternity with God and Jesus and my grandpa and my dad... but i can't help wondering what will happen if that place doesn't exist. you don't even know how hard it is for me to type this, no matter how fast my fingers are going. i hate that i have this doubt in me, like a stone in my heart that's always there and weighing my down so that i can't float through life like the people around me. but that place is all that i could ever ask for, and i have no clue what would happen if when i die, i have to face eternity alone without that.

sorry for the sadness, but its just something that needs to be said. i'll try not to darken your days any more with sad posts, haha. well, i need to go, i'm leaving tomorrow morning for Winona MN and i've been to bed really late all week. i'll try to be a happier poster from now on. :D